Sisi Senaponi's Blog

Una doh o! I greet o! How de economy for your side?!  God no go shame us! E get one period wey things jor get as e be.  Na so I kukuma pack my kaya go village! I go hustle small for that side! After some time don pass,my childhood friend say make i come back Lagos, make we see how to rough everything together! The day after i enter town, come even coincide with one interview wah get for mainland.  Na that time wey office work make serious sense!  E nor matter if na Sekuriti you be, just knack tie and coat comot for house! Na there respect dey that time, as plenty Monitoring Spirits full Area! People wey sabi say their family and neighbours get bad mouth nor dey bother disclose the kain job wey dem dey do!  Even person wey go tanda for newspaper stand from morning till evening, go say na office he go!🤣 Na when end of the month reach to bring salary come house, the men go start intentional kworeh with their wives. So they nor go drop shishi! Nna ehn, e don tey we...

  Kpoi! Kpoi! Kpoi! Na who dey haasee e?! I hail o! How Markeit?! Una do well! E don tey wah hear paranranran for area like that! Na im even remind me this gist wah wan give una!   Mama Ejima, my neighbor, open door, begin shout for yard early morning! I open window say, Na you and who?! Na who thief your pikin?! Nor gree to pay dem ransom o! Gee dem only two days! Na dem go return your Bush babies, Sorry... I mean the Baby shidren! *side-eyes*   I think again, I say...Abi na who wan carry belle gee your horseband?! Sorry their hubs...your husband?! Inside this Economy?!   They nor dey fear?! Dey nor know you?! You wey be say...Thief catch Thief na your...I don almost talk am abi?! Mah kukuma complete am?…Mah nor complete am say na your specialty! *Clearsthroat! * Nor vex..So na wetin hapun?! *side-eyes* Mama Ejima say na her Younger brother, Imma, wey she carry LAPO loan give to buy trumpet. He say he wan use am do business as the Surprise, Surprise thing dey reign ...

  Una compliments of dey Hicor-normi o! My customer say she nor dey do anything wey stress her last Christmas season. I say una nor get visitors? She say na only one Brother-in-law she kukuma get. Her own twin sister dey obodo oyinbo. She say the thing wey her Brother-in-law (BIL) carry her eye see last year! God forbid bad thing! I balance say make she knack me tori o... She say she buy two gigantic okuko, bag of rice and other things say at least, Christmas and new year don settle. She say she go salon come back, one full, mature, okuko wey get ‘bearbear’ don miss! *Hian! *   Chineke! Who wan enter balcony for upstair, get confidence and lift a whole okuko! She say her twins shidren dem go their classmate birthday. She never go carry them come back house sef! Na who she go come ask?? BIL say na inside room he dey all day! *side-eyes* She say,   so he nor hear okuko wey dey shout like say person wan thief am?! He say mba! Issoraite!   Na last...

Kpoi! Kpoi! Kpoi! Na who tie rope for gate? Una Goat don waka reach Junction o! E nor even remember wear shoe! My good friend say her family na soap opera! She say her Grandmama cause plenty problem nor be small! She say the woman don carry spirit husband dash all of them ahead ahead before dey even born most of them! She say the woman sabi jump from one gini gwanu to the other! Say if persin ask her, she go say na to protect her children! She say out of 12 children wey Grandma born, na only 3 manage and stay! Two boys and a girl wey be her own Mama! She say as their Grandma kpai like this, she don handover the 'thing' give her own younger sister wey dey with her for village during that time! She say she sef begin suspect that her younger sister and her mother because e get how dem dey sleep for night! God abeg e!😂🤣 She herself turn to monitoring spirit! I say why you nor follow dem sleep like that? She say blood shortage go worry her for leg! *yeye geh!* ...

Una doh o! How de oraizon?! I salute e! I remember back in the days, wah been ask Soba my former roommate, why she nor reason this Nnamdi as dem go Uni together, he sabi book but to get job hard am nor be small! I say Aftohroh, he nor too fine! So nothing like say another woman wan snatch am comot! *Abi na?!* Soba say Mba, Nnamdi family too get spiritual problem! Say she nor wan enter covenant with poverty! I say i hear o! Small time Nnamdi sef go pack small children put for the front yard of their house, begin teach them English and Mathematics.   E nor too teh wey he see job for one nice secondary school. Na from there he tell us how the principal go dey wink am eye, to come help her comot wetin nor wan loss for her west, inside her office! *side-eyes* E say one nice young female teacher, wey begin dey like him one time, Na so princi-winchy sack the lady comot! He say one day wey she wan kiss am by force, na so he push her comot with reflex, wey her wig go one s...

I greet o! Na who dey haasee e?! Doh! I dey my customer area, I say mah stop and greet her.  Her Ada don wed, but she nor too dey visit like that! Even though na still this same Nigeria she sef dey! I say so how she dey take hol boredom?  She say na her husband be her Taataa now! Taataa as how?! He still dey find bwess wey nor dey obey gravity?! *side-eyes* She say that one for good, but wetin dey do am now, don pass wetin gravity wan uphold! The husband begin exhibit midlife crisis at over 60! He begin dey go mall to buy Skinny Jeans on top Polo and Face cap! I say on top that im alligator pointed shoe?!  She say MBA, be like he been befriend one Aunty for that mall, wey her name be Nike.  As na every thing he carry come house na her name dem put even as sales gini gwanu! *Side-eyes* i say abi make we gather and  recommend one bros gee you?! *sideeyes!* She say Tufia! She nor reason any man since 18years,  wey she marry her Golden Husband!  I say...

Wonder nor dey ever end e!   Landlord bring new tenants come yard! Two bros wey get muscle like bouncer!   For inside broad daylight, na im dem go tie 2year old pikin towel for west!   *Inside this hot afternoon, wey blood pressure and other things fit rise!*     Ehn?! Na which kain thing be this biko?!   Small time, Reverend Sister begin wear nose mask for eyes! As na near her window dem carry gym gym bench and rod keep!   Na so dem go spread leg for bench dey carry iron like Tom cruise! *persin eye nor go fit comot the kpalakpolo near dey toweh!*   Ehnn?! Landlady sef don begin wear bum short under sun and moonlight!   While Mama Ejima, my fellow tenant nor dey gree wear Bra under wrapper again!     Small breeze, na im she go fall yakata for tenant lap! *sideeyes!*   Landlord nor fit talk, as he don carry him senior put for haase!   Make persin nor carry blokos block me for b...